I like television commercials…I really do…I think it is nice that people spend so much time and money to make their products attractive to we the TV viewing audience…I would like to have my own commercial…I would advertise myself as a really nice guy, but I would have a skinnier guy play me in the ad so as to make me more attractive to the anti fat guy community…You see, that can’t be considered false advertising, because I would print the words, "actual Jaret may differ slightly from the Jaret you see on the screen." I think I would be a good seller…The stores would have lines to pick up the new Jaret…I would be the item to have on the Christmas list, and kids would ask Santa Claus for a Jaret…The only problem is, there is only one actual Jaret, so I am immediately out of print and collectable…My God, whomever ends up with me is going to make a fortune on E-bay…I should sell myself…I guess I need the commercial first though…I do like commercials – Jaret

That's a quote from the lead singer in one of my most favorite bands ever, Bowling For Soup. He's funny, don't you think?

-Insane Winged Girl